Stop being weird about Rama Duwaji

Katie Meeker, Opinions & Humor Editor

The recent New York City mayoral election has caused quite a stir not only in the city but across the nation. People from all over the world have weighed in on the discourse surrounding the mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani, a democratic-socialist who made history by being the city’s first Muslim mayor, and the youngest Mayor in over a century. 

This attention — both the good and bad — has also been directed at Mamdani’s wife: artist, advocate and VCUarts alum Rama Duwaji. 

There is a very thin line between admiration and obsession, though, and when it comes to Gracie Mansion’s new prospective residents — especially Duwaji — people are really starting to skate that edge. 

At 28-years-old, Duwaji is New York’s first “Gen Z” first lady and has captured the hearts of many across social media. With the election hardly over, her chic style, haircut and unflappable attitude have already christened a style trend being called “aloof wife autumn.” 

Beyond her impeccable personal style, Duwaji is also an activist and a vocal advocate against Israel’s genocide in Gaza, the violence in Sudan and other global injustices. She promotes a better, more just world with her artistry. 

Duwaji has been using her newfound fame to champion these causes — most of her Instagram posts since the election have hardly mentioned her husband and instead focus on her activism.

Palestinian fashion designer Zeid Hijazi created part of the outfit she wore to Mamdani’s victory speech, a choice as deliberate as it is powerful. 

Duwaji’s new status as a fashion icon and her dedication to social justice have left an indelible mark on the minds of the people, for better or for worse. 

For one, there seems to be a deep-seated fixation on Duwaji’s looks — not just her fashion style, but her physical attributes. Critics and haters alike have taken potshots at her appearance, comparing her to right-wing women like first lady Melania Trump and disparaging her “un-American” look. 

Even those who support Mamdani’s politics have given Duwaji’s appearance special attention, commenting on her “first lady” caliber or singing her praises in a way that borders on uncomfortable. 

Both the attacks and disturbing praise hold little weight, but they are indicative of a larger problem: Duwaji is not allowed to exist in her identity as an artist and advocate without also reckoning with her womanhood. Her first lady status is the vehicle that gave her this new recognition, but it also hinders her, as she is solely thought of in relation to her husband. 

“Is Duwaji pretty enough to be first lady?” “She doesn’t fit the typical build — what is she doing to revolutionize it? Is she succeeding?” Most importantly: “is she making her husband look good?” 

Duwaji’s eponymous “aloofness,” a word used interchangeably with “detached” and “unfriendly,” is also a product of this phenomenon. Duwaji’s Instagram page features little to no mention of her husband and his campaign, and she was absent from most debates and major events prior to election day. 

While this “aloofness” started an entire fashion trend, it should be noted that Duwaji is so associated with this trait because she prioritizes her art, causes and personal life over the standards typical of being first lady: public support and exaltation of her husband. 

This is not to say Duwaji was not involved in Mamdani’s campaign — she has boosted his social media presence, helped design his logos and was a major source of personal support for her husband during the long trail towards Election Day. 

It is interesting, however, that she is still characterized as “aloof” when all she did was maintain a public degree of separation between her own passions and Mamdani’s.

I know everyone is excited about the first Gen Z first lady and her killer fashion, powerful, beautiful artwork and dedication to justice — I am too. But it’s no excuse to overlook basic decency and respect. We need to remember that, despite Duwaji’s veneer of coolness, she is just a person, and boiling her down just to her appearance and relationship is unjust.

Stop being weird about Rama Duwaji. 

Her husband hasn’t even been sworn in yet; calm down. 

If you truly want to show your appreciation, then stop spending so much time discussing her appearance and spend more time talking about her contributions to the world as an artist and advocate — she deserves that much, at least.