In defense of sincerity

Sébastienne Brower, Contributing Writer

Cringe. A label we love to throw at one another, and a core part of our cultural lexicon. I do not need to define it — you know what it means. 

You happen to see a bunch of LARPers in the park while driving past? Cringe. Someone is loudly singing along to a song despite the bustling world around them and people staring? Cringe. A classmate is wearing something you would not be caught dead in? Cringe.

You feel it — the clenching of your teeth, the hair on the back of your neck standing up. A particularly bad instance of it might even make you avert your eyes and retreat to the crueler parts of your mind. 

It seems almost everything today is cringe. My friends occasionally ask me if what they are wearing is okay — “If you saw me and did not know me, would you laugh?” When my best friend asks if what she is wearing falls under the sprawling umbrella that is “cringe,” I try not to wince. Her outfits are always beautiful, purposefully chosen and delicately adorned, yet she is scared. She is frightened of this other that lurks in each and every one of our minds.

This deeply troubles me. Online, I see people talking about how thankful they are for not being recorded while dancing at public events like a club or a wedding, scared of being posted and deemed cringeworthy.

Who can blame them? Who can blame anyone that sees themselves in the grips of an abysmally sardonic public? We live in a time of surveillance  —  everyone has a camera in their pocket or hand, the shutters waiting to “snap-snap-snap.” 

“This will be great for Instagram,” they say. “Twitter (this writer refuses to refer to Twitter as ‘X’ on principle) will love this. My views will increase. TikTok will finally shell out.”

Do not get me wrong— I love social media. I have had a Tumblr account since 2011, use Instagram daily and rotting my brain on TikTok is a highlight of my day. 

I am not knocking social media itself but the exploitation of one another on it —those who take advantage of non-consenting people who are just trying to live their lives.

I hate that we have all built this panopticon in our heads, an evil collusion of nefarious beings always judging our slightest move.

When you think about sincerity, what do you picture? Do you imagine your parents expressing their love? A deep apology you once uttered through tears? Whatever comes to mind is a demonstration of the deep and wondrous nature of being human and the wondrous thing we call empathy. 

When people decide to be themselves — whatever that may entail — that is sincerity. 

The person who decides to tattoo their entire body with anime tattoos is sincere. The person who swings a wooden sword, hell-bent on defending the kingdom of Monroe Park, is sincere. The trans woman deciding to wear a skirt or makeup for the first time in her life because she can is sincere. The individuals protesting against the Palestinian Genocide are sincere. Your friends and your loved ones are sincere. At some point in your life, you have been, are currently and will be sincere.

Many people throughout your life will take your sincerity and try to twist it, mutate it and reject it. You must ignore that horrible coven of nay-sayers in your head and live your truth. 

To be cringe is to be free.