Zodiac Cookies

Scorpio Oct. 24 – Nov. 21
Join a club and make new friends because your old friends are not worth your time.

Sagittarius Nov. 22 – Dec. 21
A visit to an elderly relative gives new perspective and perspiration.

Capricorn Dec. 22 – Jan. 19
Confucius say: No Scott. Mini Capricorn, we do not eat kitty’s ears.

Aquarius Jan. 20 – Feb. 18
Hang out in a bar with a monosyllabic name like Mars. Wear the tight pants and the one will notice you after all.

Pisces Feb. 19- March 20
Create a new club, create a new look or create art. You need this form of exploration at this point in your life. Create more.

Aries March 21 – April 19
Lost love can be rekindled, but do you really want that?

Taurus April 20 – May 20
Don’t be so bullheaded this week or people will mistake you for another horned animal.

Gemini May 21 – June 21
The answer was and always will be: 42. Now what is the question??

Cancer June 22 – July 22
That’s not nice and you know it. Do it anyways. Just remember: tires are not meant to be slashed and the law frowns on this.

Leo July 23 – Aug. 22
Music invigorates the soul this week. Pick up a Nanci Raygun flier and go to a show. You will meet someone there who will change everything.

Virgo Aug. 23 – Sept. 22
Forgive and forget this time. This is only road five; there are many left to walk.

Libra Sept. 23 – Oct. 23
Jump into your time machine and dress 80s. The dance floor is calling you this week.