Doubled over by the Double Down
Roberto Curtis
Executive Editor
The newsroom smells like fried grease and my brain is firing about as slowly as snail in winter morning rush hour. No, it’s not lunchtime in the middle of exam week—it’s the meat-induced hangover that comes free with eating KFC’s new Double Down sandwich.
Another abomination in the new wave of anti-healthy menu items from fast food restaurants (think Wendy’s Baconator), the Double Down is a time bomb of chicken, bacon, cheese and “Colonel’s Sauce,” whatever that is.
This vegan’s nightmare packs a stunning 540 calories, 10 grams of saturated fat, 145 milligrams of cholesterol, 1,380 milligrams of sodium and a gram of sugar—surprising because on both the crispy and grilled versions of the sandwich, all I could really taste was salt.
The first couple chomps on the fried Double Down were admittedly succulent and tasty. I found myself in a salty, sweet, warm, gooey wonderland. Unfortunately, the only redeeming quality of the sandwich, the Colonel’s Sauce, was hard to come by. Somewhere in the realm of honey mustard and corn syrup, it added a nice balance to the meat-on-meat combo.
But the fun ended there.
After about a half hour, I caught myself slurring my words and my brain was almost sluggish enough to justify eating this way for many meals to come.
As my position at The CT nears a close, and the cholesterol in my arteries builds up, please take special note of the house ad on the back cover. My position might become available sooner than expected.