Yearlong Audition: Andrew Kearns | AFO and French

Andrew Kearns came to VCU as an AFO student with an intention to major in graphic design, a dream of his since his junior year of high school.

After a semester in the AFO program, Kearns dropped out of AFO and switched his major to French.

Kearns spent his senior year of high school in France, returning to America and starting at VCU with only a few weeks to adjust to the change.

“I was not expecting a lot from VCU, not because of the school itself. … It’s not about the school, it was about me,” Kearns said. “I was coming down off of the best year of my life, so it’s kind of like there is no year of college that can top that year being abroad. I kind of came into it knowing that I wasn’t going to have as much fun.”

Had he continued in the AFO program, Kearns would have pursued graphic design, a decision based largely on his junior year of high school when he worked on his school’s yearbook staff.

Kearns does not regret his time spent in AFO, believing that, as an artist, he would have always wondered what art school would have been like had he not started AFO. Throughout the first semester, Kearns did not realize that he was not enjoying his classes because the setting and activities were new to him.

“I know that if I hadn’t done it, I would have always been like ‘what if,’” Kearns said. “When I came back here, even if I didn’t love it, it was new. It was all art all the time. … I just woke up one day and was like ‘I hate this.’”

Kearns’ one regret was that, since he came to VCU off the emotional high of being in France with his now-boyfriend and group of friends there, he was too socially drained to cultivate a new group of close friends.

While in France, Kearns worked to create a new group of friends for his year there and upon coming back to America, Kearns was not interested in finding a new set of friends.

“I’ve been really lonely because I haven’t continuously made lots of effort to meet new people or maintain or build relationships with them,” he said. “A lot of it is because I’m tired socially because I put forth so much effort last year in France.”

Next year, Kearns will return to France to attend Sorbonne University in Paris and be reunited with his boyfriend and friends in France from last year. He will transfer the credits back to VCU and will return for his junior year of college. Kearns did not know that he would be returning to France until two weeks ago, and attributes much of his unhappiness with VCU to his stance of just trying to get through the work at hand each day.

“I didn’t try to be happy and I think that is a lot of what happiness is, is accepting where you are and making the best of it. I definitely didn’t make the best of it,” Kearns said. “I came in with the mindset of, ‘Just work really hard these four years and you won’t have fun, but you’re going to get to a better place.’”

Kearns spent most of his time this year working, whether for classes, his work-study job at the graphics lab in the Pollak building or his job at Extreme Pizza. He believes that he impressed himself the most with his perseverance in his work during the past two semesters, which he saw as difficult emotionally.

“Knowing how sad and depressed I’ve been all semester, being away from my boyfriend, being away from all of my friends, not wanting to be here really, not enjoying what I’m doing, I don’t know anyone that could be in that position and also get As in all of my classes, work 30 hours a week (and) get all my work done,” Kearns said.

Kearns said that returning to France has been his motivation over the last few weeks and does not believe that he could have done everything he has done over the past year had he not gone to France during his senior year of high school.

“I almost feel like next year will be even better because I know that I’ve earned it. I have spent all year working,” Kearns said. “You have to balance work and play, but this year it’s been really all work and no play, but as sad as it is and as much as I regret that, I’m proud of myself for doing it.”

-Samantha Foster