STRAIGHT OUTTA HELL BLOCK- How to talk dirty and influence people

I have a confession to make: I swear like a
sailor. Throughout my entire life, I have been
chastised for my colorful vocabulary, but I have
my reasons for keeping it the way it is. Some say profanity
is the speech of the uninformed, but I prefer to think of it as a better
means to communicate.

The entire notion of there being such a thing as a “bad word” is preposterous. What
have these words done to be deemed “bad?” Words, when you really think about
them, are just random collections of syllables. To be afraid of words is ridiculous.
What is interesting in this culture is that vulgarity is judged by the actual words
you use, not the content of your message. You could talk about group sex and be
perfectly within the limits of decency as long as you don’t use the term “gang bang.”
You could speak about semen as long as you don’t refer to it as “cu-.”

Everyday, idiots with TV shows and radio programs utter the foulest hate speech
and get away with it unscathed. If a celebrity accidentally swears on live television, the
Federal Communications Commission will come after the celebrity, the interviewer
and the network airing the program. Jerry Falwell famously blamed abortionists,
homosexuals and the American Civil Liberties Union for the attacks on the World
Trade Center two days after the towers fell. The FCC did nothing.

For instance, consider the word “sh-.” This word has been deemed unfit for
high company, yet “crap,” “poop” or “feces” are more acceptable (especially when
in reference to Mel Gibson’s acting career).

We are afraid of this word. We are cowards about the language we have created.

We also are afraid of the word “fu-.” This word generally refers to the act of
having sex, which in our culture today is perfectly acceptable to discuss. You can’t
even go through a check-out line at the grocery store without having a headline,
such as “27 New Sex Positions That Will Blow Your Head Off,” screaming at you
from the nearest magazine rack.

“Fu-” is one of the most versatile words ever created. How many other words
can be used as a noun, verb and adjective?

The only exceptions to my theory are degrading terms for groups of people,
such as racial and ethnic epithets. These words carry much more weight than
normal curse words. When you say the word “ni-,” you obviously are saying
more than a random collection of syllables. Words like these invoke thoughts of
generations of suffering and oppression.

Some slurs are unrecognized by the populace. I was on Facebook.com not long
ago and saw a “Fu-ing Guido Party” advertised. “Guido” is an ethnic slur against
Italians. Attendants to the party were directed to wear tight-fitting t-shirts and tank
tops, gold chains and blowout haircuts, and to act degrading to women.

There is nothing wrong with having a themed party – even one that pokes
fun at Italian culture – but to call it a “Fu-ing Guido Party” is a step too far. I
contacted the host of the party who assured me that “Guido” was not an ethnic
slur and was akin to saying “bro.” And this is coming from someone I know to
be a very nice guy.

Being afraid of words is a preposterous concept, but one only should go so far
to prove their point.

Swearing can be used to spice up
conversation, but just like any spice,
moderation is key. The main purpose
of any communication is, of course, to
communicate. If you feel that profanity
will help you get your point across, then
my vote is that you should let loose by
all means.

Disclaimer: The CT’s editorial
policy is not to publish words commonly
deemed profane; however, it
should be noted the author of this
piece intended for profane words
to be printed in full.