‘Final Destination 2’ as original as the title

Right from the opening scene, I knew this movie was going to be trouble. Shots of a dark, shadowy bedroom that really resemble a garage with a bed in it are flashed while a news show playing in the background announces that it is the one year anniversary of the crash of Flight 180 (the plane from the first movie that the original cast was supposed to die on).

As spiders crawl around the room and we see evil clowns swing from the ceiling, it is revealed that this is actually the bedroom of an all-American rich girl, Kim, who replaces Devon Sawa’s vision-plagued character. Unfortunately, this is the most realistic scene in the movie.

The rest of the movie is basically a remake of the first movie, except that instead of Sawa predicting a plane crash, Kim predicts a car crash and subsequently saves a group of people from certain death. So, once again, Death has been “cheated” and must go back to tie up all the loose ends. Oh, but here is the big change: this time Death is going backward. Oooooh!

To compensate for using the exact same plot again, the filmmakers up the gore drastically! From the first vision that includes enormous tree trunks slamming through people’s bodies to the last death in which a boy’s body is blown into pieces (not nice indistinguishable bits, but actually identifiable pieces) this movie is pure, unadulterated gore. If you are easily disgusted, be on the lookout for ladders, pigeons, and above all, barbed wire.

In a desperate attempt to link everything together, the writers decided that all the characters in this movie are only alive because the characters in the last movie died. It’s all in Death’s plan.

The movie had several laughable moments. One occurred when the “survivors” were safeguarding the apartment of the hunky cop they were staying with. The acid addict character opens a closet full of skate blades, skate clamps, ski poles and snow shoe clamps and hooks. Apparently the cop lived an alternate life as a figure skater.

Death can move things in this movie. It’s gone beyond shutting doors and causing the occasional fatal leaky faucet. Yes, this time Death can push rolling carts around, wind cords and unplug stuff.

The funny thing about horror movies is this: no matter how unrealistic, predictable and stupid they are, they still give you the creeps. As I walked to my car that night, I verbally berated myself as I checked the backseat and yes, trunk of my car just to be sure there were no intruders lurking about. Then, to my own chagrin, I took the long way home, the way that didn’t cross over any railroad tracks just in case Death was lurking around and decided to make the railroad warning lights malfunction.

So while you’ll more than likely come away from this movie feeling as though your intelligence has been insulted, you’ll also be undeniably freaked out, because Death has a mind of its own.