Grace Miglorie, Contributing Writer
We all know “cool girl.”
We love cool girl. We wish we were cool girl. She’s almost like you, but she’s not — she’s better.
We see her on the street, across from us in the coffee shop, and on our Tiktok “for you” page while we scroll through thousands of variations of cool girl.
She shows us her new, cool bag, her new, cool jacket and her cool “dark academia whimsygoth y2k” makeup that she achieved through her 23-step routine — done all with products that are linked in her bio for us to purchase, so that we too can be cool girl.
She seems to have endless outfits, all perfectly curated to fit her niche aesthetic, probably one with a hyper-specific name coined by an influencer. She is effortless and put together, and she is getting PR packages from brands you only wish you could afford.
But who is cool girl, outside of appearance? What do we really know about her other than what she wears and buys?
Being a “cool girl” is not about personality, hobbies or ideals — it is about consumerism. To be cool, you must have an aesthetic, and you must sanitize and reject the aspects of yourself that do not align with it.
We are subduing and lessening ourselves to fit into one heavily curated aesthetic, because if we don’t do that, then who even are we?
These aesthetics are defined by what we are wearing and the products we are using, not by a personality trait, hobby or values. This trend is making us lose ourselves at our core and instigating a culture of aesthetics — a culture of people who are what they buy, not who they are.
There is no pretentiousness about this coming from me. I’m no better and less influenced than anyone else. I see the cool girl wearing a baggy Carhartt jacket and suddenly I’m on Depop for three hours trying to find the same one so that I can be cool girl too.
Is my identity even me anymore, or is it an identity that has been sold to me via algorithms that encourage me to purchase things that align with that identity? Is that tank top “so me-coded” or is it a product of years of marketing that tells me I should buy something so I can fit into the mold of what I think I should be?
The desire to perform, edit and dull ourselves down to a narrow label needs to end — it is ruining us. The obsession with purchasing something because we believe it will enhance our aesthetic, and therefore us as a person, needs to stop. It is crucial that we start getting back to our core selves and losing the desire to fit in one box.
Our existence is not an aesthetic. We do not have to brand ourselves, especially with actual brands. The coolest girls I know are the ones who do what they truly enjoy, the ones who wear what they truly want, the ones who don’t feel the need to buy into the latest trend or aesthetic, the ones who don’t care if they’re cool girl or not.
Wear what you actually enjoy and find appealing, no matter if it’s 12 different styles in one. Buy the makeup you think is genuinely pretty, do your hair how you like it, not how you think you should do it because the girl on TikTok told you to.
You do not have to label yourself — you are not a product. I promise you, you are so much cooler when you embrace the things that bring you joy and are sincerely aligned with yourself. That’s cool girl.