An Ode to Self Care

Illustration by Iain Duffus
Illustration by Iain Duffus

How does one go about you marrying the ideas of “nothing matters” with the importance of working for social justice and equity to alleviate others’ suffering?

No matter how you feel about this universe and why humankind may or may not be on it, I think nothing has to matter for you to be a good person and treat yourself, others and the earth with respect, love and care.

 

Recently someone complimented me saying I have a nice figure and then they jokingly said they hated me. What do you think is the best way to get people, specifically women, to understand that we all have different body types and that’s okay?

I think we have a lot of unlearning to do when it comes to women and how we perceive them, not just in fashion or the media. It’s well known that the average American woman is anywhere between a size 12 and 16 which is considered plus sized, but nothing on shelves, television or in magazines reflects that. This is probably how this certain someone came to be insecure about themselves and projects that onto others via backhanded compliments.  

 

Do you really think accepting gifts is okay even when you know they’re being used to buy a way into your affections?

I’m usually the first one to take something just because it’s free but I’ve learned that the old saying is kinda true: “there’s no such thing as a free lunch.” Of course the context of lunch is a little off here, but my point remains that when a gift isn’t given to you out of love or thoughtfulness people could begin to expect things from you in return which is not how giving a gift works. It’s best not to open yourself up to that.

 

How do you go about getting someone you’ve only been talking to for a while to talk about their STI and STD status?

This is something that should come up while you’re dating and hopefully before that sort of physical exchange happens. Bring it up casually and have an open and honest conversation about your sexual health. You can even make a date of it and get tested regularly together as a couple if that makes things easier. As always, make sure you are having safe and consensual sex.


If you’d like to send Shaun a question you can submit them via email at Jacksonsk@commonwelathtimes.org or anonymously at Lascivious-Witch.Tumblr.Com/Ask  


Shaun Jackson
Staff Columnist

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