There are things everyone loves to hate. Beauty
pageants are no exception, particularly the Miss
Teen USA 2007 pageant that took place nearly
two weeks ago.
Some of us still can’t stop talking about it. For
instance, my roommates, who are far more observant
about these things than I, pointed out that two
contestants wore the same dress. Ouch.
And even if we didn’t tune into the original
broadcast, surely we’ve all seen the same YouTube.
com video of Lauren Caitlin Upton, or Miss Teen
South Carolina.
Nobody’s immune to anxiety, especially during
a nationally televised competition. However, the
ability to respond to interview questions under
pressure while wearing an evening gown is simply
the nature of the beast. Upton now might be
considered a worst-case scenario.
Let’s briefly analyze her response to why one-
fifth of Americans can’t locate the U.S. on a world
map:
Upton’s first mistake was saying “U.S. Americans,”
a phrase fresh from the Department of
Redundancy Department. It’s hard to believe “some
people out there in our nation” don’t have maps.
Maps are everywhere, plastered on everything from
Target shower curtains to Wal-Mart placemats.
Honestly, America is kind of hard to miss. Most
of us learned how to read maps in pre-school, if
not before then.
Correct me if I’m misinformed, but isn’t South
Africa one of the more economically developed
African countries? The same goes for Japan and
China. As for Iraq, well, that really has nothing to
do with the original question. Maybe if it had been
about foreign policy instead of education, then her
shopping list of mentionables (Iraq, Africa and Asia)
would have been appropriate.
Upton appeared on the “Today” show the following
Tuesday to correct her mistake, but she never did
seem to answer the question. To her credit, she did
say our national education system should emphasize
geography more. (Dear PBS, please find some way
to resurrect “Carmen Sandiego.” Thanks.)
Google searches can come up with some pretty
amazing results. For example, type in “Miss Teen
South Carolina.” The sponsored link reads, “Dumb
Video Moments Online.” And this isn’t just any other
link; it’s to CNN.com. How about them apples?
Then again, Upton might not even be aware that
CNN is only one of the most preferred and reliable
news sources out there.
On the pageant’s Web site, Upton’s profile says
she wants to be an international model. I’m not sure
about the “international” part, but I have a feeling
Tyra Banks would want her to be able to find other
countries and cities on a world map.
If girls like Upton are the products of our national
educational system’s downfall, we’re going to have
to step it up and enforce a “no idiot” policy inside
the classroom.