One of my favorite memories involves me in kindergarten, tracing my hand on brown construction paper to make construction-paper turkeys. It’s a warm, safe, happy memory.
It saddens me to know that metaphorically, all my paper turkeys are now drunken hobos because “the man” has driven them to poverty and despair. And that “man” is Christmas.
Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas, but Christmas has its own time to prostitute itself to consumers and the media. As soon as the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade ends and George Bailey becomes nuttier than a squirrel on national television, then it’s Christmas’ time to shine.
Yet shortly before Halloween, I already saw some Christmas ads on TV. Once Halloween ended, I saw more Christmas ads than Thanksgiving ones in magazines and on television. With so many Christmas decorations, songs and presents, Christmas is easy to sell.
Still, Thanksgiving is important. Thanksgiving should get most of November. It’s only fair, especially when it’s stuck between the great holidays, Halloween and Christmas.
Halloween is like a smart, oldest artsy child who is unique, striking, spooky and fun (come to think of it, Halloween reminds me of many VCU art students). Halloween is interested in intense, dramatic stories and creative visual flair.
Christmas, meanwhile, is the golden child. She gets good grades, she’s beautiful, she knows all these great songs, and she’s popular and fun. Yet deep down she’s a shallow, attention-hungry whore. She forgets about her old friend Jesus and would rather hang out with the cool kids, like Santa.
And what follows Christmas? New Year’s Eve, which gets a week of fame and a minute of glory, and then it ends.
But I digress. The biggest problem is that poor Thanksgiving, the sweet, grateful middle child, gets shafted. I blame that corporate slut, Christmas. Thanksgiving will be at a party, talking about turkeys and gravy with a crowd. Then Christmas will suddenly pull down her top and flash her ornaments and everyone becomes distracted, forgets about Thanksgiving, and pays attention to Christmas.
Thanksgiving will try to attract a boy she likes with good, old-fashioned charms like mashed potatoes and pie. Christmas will push her sister aside and talk to the boy about her boxes of presents. Of course he’ll forget about Thanksgiving because he’d rather get into her sister’s box.
So I am asking the media and retailers, the PR agents of Christmas, to forget that holiday during November. Thanksgiving is a wonderful holiday that doesn’t get enough attention. I want to see more ads for turkeys and more Pilgrim-themed commercials. Christmas needs its comeuppance.
Now if you don’t mind, I need to hang some wreaths and make some eggnog. Feliz Navidad, VCU!
Lisa Chun may be reached at bureacrat85@yahoo.com