Making Sexpectaions Great

The VCU Wellness Center and the Center for Cultural Experiences and Prevention hosted part two of the Great Sexpectations series in the University Student Common Salon last Tuesday, October10, 2017.

The event was held to help students take more of healthy approach to sex and minimize the focus on what they call the tube sock mandingo porn “sexpectation” emphasized popular culture, according to its organizers.  

As the clock approached 4:30 p.m. and the Wellness Center employees and volunteers set up matching condom games, students filled the seats and waited for the fun.

The icebreaker activity called “condom sense” involved listing the steps to take when initiating sexual relations in chronological order. The steps started from describing how to establish consent, which organizers said can be revoked at anytime, and ended with the final step of tying the condom into a knot and properly disposing of it.]

In an effort to build the comfort zones for students, the hosts divided the audience into five groups to put a competitive twist on the remaining activities. The second activity required the students to make a list of as many nicknames as possible for body parts and sexual acts.

As the team discussions began, the room filled with more laughs than the expected nervous looks. Each team came up with an assorted list for each category in one minute and each team’s spokesperson shared their list with the audience.

Body part names ranged from the classic household references to original expressions of teams’ creativity. The employees for the CCEP and The Well, facilitated this activity in order to break the barriers of sexual taboos that deter students from participating in informative sexual discussions, said Mona Quarless, senior prevention specialist at the CCEP.

They also brought attention to the synonymity of sex with violent acts like “banging” and “smashing.” The patterns in sexual ideology of female body parts as food and male body parts as aggressive introduce the issue of reality versus “expectations,” said Fatima Smith, assistant director of The Well.

Smith, Quarless and their colleagues redirected the discussion to tackle “sexpectation” issues and other questions which are not often asked, that have been recognized through their experiences with students in their professions.

“It takes more than a position to have healthy sex. Be prepared with the proper tools like body consciousness through acts of masterbastion to develop a healthy pyschological sexual environment.” Smith said.

Quarless and Smith gave detailed explanations of the functions of reproductive organs and their varying functions. For example, the shape and direction of female’s sexual organs react dependending on their partner, the timing of the month, their state of mind, explained Quarless and Smith.

They encouraged students to pay attention to body reactions to varying sexual positions and experiences. “Notice changes in breathing… [and] just because you do one sexual act with one person doesn’t mean you should [or have to] do it with [all your partners],” said Smith.

The program with ended with a brief education condom game and condom distribution. They also encouraged students to reach out and share their experiences with their friends as they look forward to part three of the Great Sexpectaions series on November 7 at 7 p.m.

Nyasia Milan Williams, Contributing Writer